Photographed Fat

Like many mothers, I teared up when I read this article about moms being in pictures with their kids (click here for article). I vowed thereafter to be in more photographs with my family and friends, even if I didn't feel as lovely as I desired to feel. My chubby, smiling, face has appeared in dozens of group selfies and snapshots since taking that vow. Then, a few months ago I decided that my family should put on our Pinterest-coordinated best and have professional photos taken.

I wanted to look pretty in our family pictures, therefore I spent countless hours shopping online (the best bet for plus sizes) for a pretty dress that would be both flattering for me and easy to coordinate with the males in my family. When picture day came, I spent extra time doing my makeup and straightening my hair. However, neither clothing nor cosmetics can hide the fact that I... am a big 'ol woman.

While the camera was clicking I did not worry whether or not the pictures would make me look fat. I KNEW they would. That's my reality. I am a fat woman...and save for a few short years after college, I always have been. Because of this reality, the photographs did not reveal some secret shame for me...they just showed...me. The images showed over sized, corpulent, aging, graying, dark haired, dark eyed, confident, outgoing, beautiful, well-loved...Me...surrounded on each ample side by my precious husband and children.

Since this summer, I have endeavored to slowly increase my fitness levels. I walked my first 5k on my birthday and have plans to train and walk another on Thanksgiving. As I move into a more active lifestyle, my body might change. Or....it might not change very much at all...there are actually many very fit, fat people (click here, here, and here for some examples). What I appreciate about the photographs we just had taken is that they show who I am right now. In the Fall of 2015, this is what I look like...this is who I am. And, when the people in my life look back at these pictures 10 years from now, they will look into my plump face and remember the laughter, the tears, and the authentic life that we shared together.